8.31.2011 Rochester has secret win power, like their secret insane pyro jungle wife in the attic.

Red Wings defeat sweaty meathead Pawtucket bats, 4-2.

Can't get too deep into this game, since I don't really have my writing pants on this aft. Kyle Weiland ruined Christmas out there in New York while living in The Bankrupt City That No One Cared About ruined Christmas for me. Oh, boo-hoo. I read some books that made me cry and cry and I realized that internet access has transformed me from a comelibros to a dumdum.

Starting pitcher for Rochester was Liam Hendriks, who is Australian. What is it with the Twins and their Australians? I know the obvious answer is that their scouts roll deep in Australia, but obvious answers are seldom exciting.

Junichi Tazawa and Scott Atchison pitched an inning apiece and kept Rochester from scoring the rest of the game. KYLE. Kevin Youkilis hit a home run. I hope he was a gracuious guest of the Pawtucket Sox. I mean, I'm not really a Lowrie fan, but at least when he came to Pawtucket and really pitched in, he commented publicly that it was nice to help the team get a win. I doubt Youkilis gives a shit. Probably kept referring to Nate Spears and Anderson as 'Matt' and 'Johan'.

FINE. I'm sure Youkilis was reasonably nice. Him and Jeff Bailey go way back, right? Bailey hit two doubles for the R. Wings, too.

This game was only two hours and twenty minutes long.

By the way, what's up with Jason Rice going to Oakland?

No game tonight, but maybe tomorrow I'll properly assess this one or something like it.

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