4.29.13 Pawtucket v Columbus - Mil de Iglesias

Cor, DM! Pawtucket wins 5-1, even though Toru Murata seemed to be giving the PawSox the business for the first few innings. Oscar Villareal and his sick dance moves get the win.

Steven Wright started for Pawtucket and was all over the place for the first couple of innings. Typical knuckleball stuff: Walks and wild pitches and passed balls. A double play really saved Wright's ass in the second inning. Wright pitched four innings, but he was up to 84 pitches and so Oscar Villareal swept in and became the hero.

Trevor Bauer was supposed to start for the Clippers, but something happened and instead we got Toru Murata. Murata pitched six innings and gave up four runs, including three home runs. Of course, I missed a couple of them when I went to get beers. But I did see Iglesias' home run, which was great. There was the added bonus of seeing Iglesias flex his muscles as he crossed the plate, which I think his teammates dared him to do.

Bryce Brentz and Brandon Snyder hit back-to-back home runs in the fourth inning, then Snyder homered again in the eighth. Pedro Beato pitched after Villareal, was pretty badass. Anthony Carter pitched the ninth and gave up a double, but ultimately kept Columbus scoreless.

No sign of Hanrahan or Breslow, but that's fine. They were holding the team back, anyway.

two things:
1. Mark Hamilton struck out three times. Ronald Bermudez hasn't gotten a hit yet in triple-A.

2. Just found out that Jon Hee retired. Crazy! I saw him last night in the dugout, saw he was on the "disabled" "list", and now this. I bowled with Jon Hee, he seemed reasonably nice even if he was no Handsome Randy Williams.

I guess that's all. I'm not going to Buffalo this year, unless I win millions of dollars. That's an entirely different story, though.

Rubby De La Rosa pitching right now for Pawtucket, so go check that out while I comb my hair.


4.28.13 Pawtucket v Columbus - Junk Drawer

Clippers flip it and reverse it, win 6-5 like Pawtucket won 6-5 yesterday. Only with far less explosives.

Terry Doyle had a rough start, giving up five runs in 3 1/3 innings. And then he had five (count 'em!) relievers tumbling after, and no one else gave up a run except Craig Breslow, who doesn't count.

Daisuke Matsuzaka started for Columbus and he did really well... In Triple-A... for the Cleveland Indians franchise. I'm sure he's crying into his millions. Why is he even bothering? He pitched three scoreless innings. So Matsuzaka's like some minor league pitcher now riding on buses and hanging out with, like, Omir Santos.I should go talk to him.

So midway through the fourth inning, Doyle's brother was obviously not on top of things and giving up all kinds of hits and falling behind. Jose De La Torre took over and gave up another run that was charged to Doyle. And then Craig Breslow, Anthony Carter, Joel Hanrahan, and Ryan Rowland-Smith all pitched and I think Manny Delcarmen was there for a little while and then we went over to Jerry's house and everybody did a little acid. We watched him kill one of his wives and we didn't care because we were so high.

In the seventh inning, Mark Hamilton, Bryce Brentz, and Dan Butler hit consecutive home runs. And then in the eighth inning, Pawtucket was like catching up and two runners were on base with only one out, but Brentz and Butler couldn't make magic happen. Columbus reliever Preston Guilmet closed up shop in the ninth, getting the side in order. Ronald Bermudez made the last out. Oh, I forgot to tell you, Ronald Bermudez is still hanging around. I think he lives in a cabin near Presque Isle. You should see his wilderness beard.

two things:
1. I don't know where Jeremy Hazelbaker is, no. I could look it up, but wouldn't that diffuse the mystery?


3. HERMIDA SPEAKS! "I had played here a little bit before, the wind was blowing out pretty good, I knew that it was going to be close - it's a short fence back there - I jumped up and it fell in there." - On robbing Drew Sutton of a home run. (Gobis) (I think the word you wanted to use was "peek", by the way.)

4. Which is a pretty good story, but it maybe seems to be missing a few things? "Red Sox reliever (shoulder stiffness) threw 17 pitches, walking one of the four batters that he faced in the eighth inning of his one frame of a re-hab assignment. Left-hander (tendinitis) threw 26 pitches over two-thirds of the fifth inning, walking two in his second appearance in two days Breslow and PawSox catcher would be just the second all-Yale battery mates in MLB since 1883. "I'm not quite there yet," said Breslow. "I'm getting close. At this point, psychologically, it's more important to know that my arm can hold up two days in a row." , the PawSox starter, had allowed just 22 base runners and four earned runs in his previous four starts, but walked five and was tagged for eight hits, throwing 90 pitches in 31/3 innings Six-year Red Sox family member was perfect on the pitching mound, retiring all nine PawSox batters he faced in his fifth start for Columbus, before suffering a left oblique muscle strain on his first pitch to in the fourth." Yeah, no need to name names.

5. Justin Henry doubled. So hot right now.

Tonight it's Steven Wright, Trevor Bauer.  I will be there, doing my thing, eating some food and learning about Cuba.



4.27.13 Pawtucket Red Sox v Columbus Clippers (CLE) - Six Years Ago

Pawtucket WINS! 6-5 and then they blew up some fireworks. Skyrockets. Burn blossoms. Whatever regional term you'd like to use. Win goes to reliever Pedro Beato, who is like so cute and I never realized it.

Starter for the Red Sox was Allen Webster, which is not a very good name for a baseball player. He should have been a research scientist or maybe done some historical re-enactments in Ticonderoga. Webster pitched four innings and gave up four runs and jetted back to the lab.

Joe Martinez got the start for the Columbus Clippers and man he threw a lot of pitches (104)! Martinez worked his way into the seventh inning, got a couple of outs, then hit the road. He struck out seven Red Sox batters, gave up two runs, and then his relief corps failed him. After all that hard work. Nobody said there was justice in sport. Except when Boston defeated the Yankees in the 2004 ALCS.

The Clippers scored three runs in the first inning. Maybe Webster was shaky, he walked a couple of guys right away and then Cord Phelps doubled and Mike McDade hit a two-run single. Hey, I remember those guys! In the bottom of the third, though, Justin Henry hit a two-run double. And while I thought it was curious that Henry was playing the outfield these past couple of days, I just now realized that Mitch Maier hasn't been around. Turns out he's on the DL, and while I didn't find a specific cause, I did discover that Maier is Mormon. Oh, God, Book Two.

Columbus pulled ahead 5-2 when they scored runs in the fourth and fifth inning. In the eighth inning, Mark Hamilton hit a fly ball double to left, scoring the mysterious Drew Sutton. But the ninth inning was when the PawSox gave the crowd a thrill!

Pawtucket was still down 5-3. Righty Matthew August Langwell was pitching for the Clippers. He walked country boy Brock Holt to get things started. Langwell got Butler to fly out, but then walked Jackie Bradley Jr. Drew Sutton entered, singled, scored Holt. Justin Henry entered, singled, scored Bradley. TIE GAME MOTHERFUCKERS! Langwell then walked the bases loaded, had to face Bryce Brentz and all his real ultimate power. Surprise! Brentz flew out.

New pitcher, Jerry Gil. Gil walked Brandon Snyder with the bases loaded, Pawtucket wins, everybody falls in love all over again.

it was a stegosaurus and its name was henry:
1. Craig Breslow came and is rehabbing and he pitched and IS IT 2006/2007? Travis Hughes, Edgar Martinez, and Bryan Corey could not be reached for comment. How long have I been doing this?

2. I had this to say about Breslow: "The first time I saw Craig Breslow was not in San Diego, but in Pawtucket. I thought he was odd-looking - all knobby and flushed and wearing an ill-fitting uniform. Nothing special. I had no idea I'd be seeing so much of him."

3. And here's an embarrassing picture. Nice hat, Jen. Also shown: Michael Scott on his day off.
4. Justin Henry had three RBI. Bradley struck out three times.

5. Jeremy Hermida used to be on the PawSox. He struck out a lot. I remember nothing about those 19 games in 2010. We got him in exchange for Hunter Jones and some other guy.

This afternoon! Or... Right now! Terry Doyle and former PawSox great Daisuke Matsuzaka. I'll be at the game tomorrow, which is Monday. See you then?


4.26.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Buffalo Bisons - Hanrahanimal

Oscar Villareal LOSES, 8-4, even though the bulk of the destruction was the result of SP Chris Hernandez' pitching. I'm sure it will all get sorted out in heaven.

El Zurdo Hernandez gave up four runs on eight hits through five innings. He threw 96 pitches, 55 for strikes. Sounds exhausting, geez. He also gave up a home run, but who hasn't lately? Besides, Buffalo is SMASHING the IL in like all the offensive categories.

Starter and winning pitcher for Buffalo was Claudio Vargas, a man I am not familiar with but I'm sure I will eventually declare my love for. I have to learn all these Blue Jays people. I will say that he's 34 and been around the block, including a stint with the Expos. Yes. Vargas went six innings, gave up all four Pawtucket runs. He also had great relief. Let's talk to it!

Buffalo got a good jump on the scoring, picking up two runs in the first inning. Pawtucket tied it in the second, which featured doubles from mighty slugger Bryce Brentz and large catcher Dan Butler. A mess o' singles in the third inning put the Red Sox up 4-2, ha ha very funny you guys. Buffalo achieved ramming speed and scored runs in the third, fourth, sixth, seventh, and eighth inning. Joel Hanrahan, former Pirate and current Boston reliever, pitched the eighth inning and gave up two runs and I'm sure you can read all about it anywhere else but here.

I am not familiar with Neil Wagner's work but he struck out the side in order in the ninth inning to keep the Bisons in the win column. Thanks for nothing, Butler, Diaz, and Bradley.

By the way, Jim Negrych is leading the entire IL in slugging, OBP, average, OPS, all that stuff. Jim Negrych! Who know he had it in him? Crazy.

Also, to comment on the "two things" portion of the blog post, I've noticed that more than ever I need to subscribe to on-line newspapers to get game stories and such. I usually prefer to get my information from bloggers anyway, but now I'll be relying on them more than ever. The sad thing is that there aren't many IL bloggers, although there are some team blogs that cover "the minors" in one post. I'm hoping to get some to develop this season. Not likely, though, damn it.

two things:
1. Michael Mroziak: "Once Buffalo got its lead back, the Bisons put the game out of reach with two home runs to right field. The first one, by Luis Jimenez in the bottom of the seventh inning, cleared the right field party patio and left the ballpark. Velez's homer landed in the same party patio, bringing the final two runs home." Party patio! Where can I get one of those?

2. Evidently, Claudio Vargas retired from baseball back in 2011 when he was in the Rockies org.

3. Doug Smith has a great story on Jim Negrych: "Then there’s the matter of his stepping into the box for Syracuse here last summer and half a Section erupting in cheers, provoking Bison catcher Josh Thole to ask, “Who the heck are you, anyway?” Negrych now is “not so sure that actually happened,” and isn’t sure Thole remembers, either."

4. Negrych hit for the cycle a few days ago, and I am just hearing about it now.

5.  Rick Sporcic talks about his time at a Bisons/Red Sox game: "During the 3rd Inning, Bisons CF, Anthony Gose began motioning something to me then yelling something. I had no idea what he was saying so I wandered towards CF and Gose told me he wanted the Big Glove." Cool pictures, too.

6. So remember how Bryce Brentz accidentally shot himself and I thought it was more likely he got into some kind of scuffle OR that alcohol was a factor? Pretty sure he just shot himself.

TONIGHT! Pawtucket's back in Rhode Island and playing the Columbus Clippers who are the Indians. Allen Webster will face Joe Martinez and hopefully destroy him. Enjoy!


4.25.13 The Pawtucket Red Sox Visit The Buffalo Bisons - Be suave, Mauro.

PawSox win, 8-3 in Buffalo. I have such fond memories of my baseball trip to Buffalo, with Mike Lowell rehabbing and Devern Hansack and Kyle Snyder and Niagara Falls and even though I got into trouble in Canada and had to go to Canadian Immigration because I may have been a kidnapper it was still so much fun. I should go back! Who's coming? WHO'S WITH ME?! MIKE LOWELL IS NEVER GOING TO CALL ME!!!


Sorry. Starting pitcher for Pawtucket was Charlie Haeger, who improved in all areas of a professional baseball start. Haegs pitched five innings and gave up two home runs... wait. Okay, not such a great start. My father has this goofy, waddling poodle named Charlie who like, if he wants to get up on the couch he has to build up momentum. It takes about three tries. But Charlie is so damn loveable. Do you understand what I am getting at?

Dave Bush started for Buffalo, and yes, it is that Dave Bush. Still kicking around and trying to  make an honest living. I saw him pitch when I went to Milwaukee, which was such a great baseball trip! My favorite big league ballpark, for sure. WAFFLE FRIES WITH CHEESE ON 'EM IN A HELMET.

Bush was the losing pitcher and he gave up five runs in 5 1/3 innings. I need to skip ahead to the offense because my time is restricted. I'm skipping breakfast for this! I can't stop talking!

Let's see, Buffalo was up 3-0 after two innings. Mauro Gomez and Ryan Langerhans each hit solo home runs in the second, which probably thrilled the crowd. Pawtucket scored all their runs in the sixth inning, though, so that probably shut those Buffalonians up good.

Dan Butler led the sixth inning off with a single, but then Jonathan Diaz lined out. So things didn't look too bad. Bush was still pitching, by the way. Diaz was his last out. Jackie Bradley Jr reached on an error, then everyone moved up after a passed ball. And then! Drew Sutton tripled, two runs come in, the cherry trees burst into blossom, the beasts in the sludge of Lake Erie stirred, car alarms went off... Suddenly, the maid screamed...

Next batter was Brandon Snyder. Snyder singled and Bradley scored. Tie game! Bush faced Mark Hamilton and walked him, not intentionally but maybe kinda. I wasn't there. It wasn't "officially" intentional. Bush gets yanked, Mickey Storey jogs out. Hamilton talks to first base ump Brad Myers, maybe a little to Luis Jimenez. Game on! Storey gets Brentz to fly out, but then gives up a three-run homer to Jeremy Hazelbaker. 6-3 Pawtucket! Next up, Jose Iglesias. Iglesias singled and then Dan Butler hit a home run to center, sealing the deal for the Red Sox.I'd like to seal his deal, if you know what I mean!

Jose De La Torre pitched the sixth and seventh inning.

two things:
1. I loved Mauro Gomez on the PawSox. Here's what Buffalo's Luis Jimenez had to say about him: "Sometimes when you come from another team and you see them you want to beat them so bad. You want to be anxious and do some stuff. We told him be suave, be easy, relax at home plate and let the ball drive. ... He’s relaxed right now and letting the ball drive. He’s not doing too much.” Rodney McKissic, Buffalo paper.

Yuck, I have to leave. More Buffalo tonight, Chris Hernandez and Claudio Vargas. Bye!

4.24.13 Makeup Game Between Buffalo and Pawtucket.

Game was played April 25th, my birthday! (maynotactuallybemybirthday)

Buffalo wins, 4-0. Loss goes to Graham Godfrey in game one of this seven inning doubleheader.

Godfrey pitched for 3 1/3 innings and gave up a couple of home runs. WHOOPS! All four runs were charged to Godfrey. Ryan Rowland-Smith and Anthony Carter finished off the game and kept it scoreless. 

Starting pitcher for Buffalo was Ramon Ortiz, so you can kind of see that no one really cared about this game. Ortiz pitched five scoreless innings. Our old friend Bobby Korecky finished the game off, finished the Red Sox off, got Bryce Brentz to ground into a double play.

That's all I got for game one.



4.23.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Buffalo Bisons - Mauro Gomez tripled.

Buffalo wins, 5-3. Loss goes to Jeremy Kehrt. Buffalo's Buddy Carlisle gets the win.

I'll be back tomorrow. Sorry! I just haven't been home much lately.


4.20.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Rochester Red Wings - But have you ever tried fielding ON POT?

Rochester wins, 5-4 in a game that was balls-cold and a little snowy. Loss goes to reliever Pedro Beato.

Starting P for Pawtucket was Charlie Haeger, who is evidently fully recovered and jumping in for Allen Webster, who was supposed to start but had explosive diarrhea. Or he got called up, I don't know. What am I, Reuters? Haeger struggled through five innings and 87 pitches, giving up two runs in the third inning and a third run in the fifth that tied the game. Haeger made an error in the fifth inning, in between giving up singles and walks.

Lefty Andrew Albers looks like Justin Morneau in his profile picture. And he's Canadian! Albers only pitched two innings, maybe because he gave up three runs and was like walking everybody. In the first inning, Drew Sutton singled with one out. Then Justin Henry singled and Lavarnway walked to load the bases. Albers proceeded to walk Bryce Brentz, so Sutton crossed the plate for the first Pawtucket run. First baseman and legit hitter Brandon Snyder hit a bloop fly ball single to right that scored Henry and Lavarnway. As it was written in the Scriptures. 3-0 Red Sox.

I told you about Strawberry Fields and also how the Red Wings tied the game up? Well, Pawtucket pulled ahead in the sixth inning when Jose Iglesias homered off reliever Shairon Martis. Don't feel too bad for Martis, he got the win. However, Pedro Beato was nabbed for a single in the dumpy lower 1/2, a victim of the classic 1B-HBP-E1-SF maneuver. That's why we lost the game, right there. Bad, bad defense. If it were not true, I would have told you so.

Seventh inning, Gary DiSarcina makes some defensive changes. In triple-A!? Nice, Gary! First baseman Chris Colabello hits a solo home run to put Rochester up for good. You can't really defend against that, unless you are Endy Chavez, Torii Hunter, Scott Rolen, that other guy. Tighten it up, Pawtucket. You need to get your house in order.

pretty sure it's spelled "Matthew"
1. Snyder went 3-4 and even though I... And I mean this in the nicest way possible... It's just that Snyder's got those Southern ways... Never mind, Snyder's a real ballplayer. I'm appreciative of his contributions as a PawSox player.

2. Jackie Bradley Jr is here, JC Linares to Portland.

3. Uh, no thank you. "The gametime temperature was 39 (wind chill 30), with wind gusts in the 20s. There was a brief snow burst before the first pitch and light snow fell in the sixth and seventh innings." - Jim Mandelaro

4. Give it up for Caleb Thielbar, who pitched three scoreless innings after Albers took a hike.

5. What the ever-loving fuck is this crap? "With that in mind, I wanted to share some texts Chris [Colabello] and I have traded since the beginning of the season. I know the whole #process thing can be easy to make fun of, but its really a way of being accountable, keeping your mind right and focusing on things you can control." JOCKS GONNA JOCK.

6. Home run boy Colabello played in the WBC (Italia) and played independent league ball for seven years before 2012. Sota Sports has a good overview on Colabello: "Chris Colabello is a 29-year old 1B/DH who played high school and college baseball in the Boston area. After going undrafted out of Assumption College in Worcester, MA, he continued his playing career in the Independent League, primarily with the Worcester Tornadoes." Get outta here!

7. "Twenty pages of Pope." Thanks for this, Colabello.

Double header today! Did you notice I was absent yesterday? Thank god, I needed to rest. Game one will be Graham Godfrey v PJ Walters, and then Chris Hernandez will hopefully K.I.T. and beat the panties off the lovely, leggy Kyle Gibson. Aw, I really like Gibson!



4.18.13 Red Sox v IronPigs - And Dr. Benton Was Pissed

Sorry I'm late. I accidentally fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of myself.

Pawtucket sucks, 14-5. Anthony Carter, what happened?

Starting pitcher for Pawtucket was Rubby De La Rosa, who lost his mind in the second inning. De la Rosa gave up four runs on two hits, but he walked half the IronPigs. Jeremy Kehrt tried to help, and he did okay, pitching four innings and I'll say "Good job, JK", even though I'm not in his fan club. His fan club is called "Common Kehrtousy". Kehrt gave up a run.

Adam Morgan was the Lehigh Valley starter and I know nothing about him. I wanna say he's a lefty... I mean, I attended this game so I should know. Warren... No, Adam Warren is a different pitcher. Morgan pitched five innings and only gave up one run.

Oscar Villareal pitched the seventh and eighth innings and gave up three runs. Anthony Carter totally Britta'd the ninth inning, giving up six g.d. runs, including a home run from Steven Lerud and a grand slam from Cody Asche. Classic Asche!

David Ortiz hit a home run.

And that's all I got.


4.17.13 Pawtucket v Lehigh Valley - Cual es tu vaina, tigre, coñaso! (FC Mero mero)

Pawtucket wins 6-1, coñaso! Win goes to Terry Doyle, who did a great job

Doyle pitched seven innings David Pauley-style, minus the recreational drug use. He gave up one run, that being a solo home run by Darin Ruf. Doyle threw 91 pitches, 64 for strikes, and struck out six batters. Of course, I missed all of this.

Starter for the IronPigs was Cesar Jiminez, who was evidently a little less successful. He didn't make five innings, but I'm not even sure if he is a starter anyway. I don't get CC'd on the lineups and such, although the IronPigs did call me and offer me a game package. Makes sense, since I live four and a half hours away.

So nobody scored until halfway through the game. In the fifth inning, Ryan Lavarnway and Brandon Snyder each hit a solo home run and it was 2-0. Ruf's home run came in the seventh to make it 2-1.

Bottom of the seventh, Zach Miner pitching. Ryan Lavarnway led off with a single, and then Miner walked both Bryce Brentz and Mitch Maier to load 'em up for Brandon Snyder. LOL Zach Miner. Snyder's been pretty good so far (TM) for Pawtucket and he did not fail to deliver in this instance, doubling to left field and bringing in a couple of runs. Jeremy Hazelbaker popped out, but then Miner walked Jonathan Diaz to load the bases again and that's what got him replaced.

Justin DeFratus! DeFratus walked Brock Holt, which brought Maier in from third. And then Drew Sutton hit a sac fly, scoring Snyder.

And then David Ortiz got the last out. Shucks!

Jose de La Torre and Chris Carpenter polished off the rest of the game like a fabulous apricot pie. Carpenter's inning wasn't the cutest thing in the world, but better than the last outing. 

if anything, just in case:
1. Brandon Snyder and Drew Sutton both made errors.

2. Mayhap you've never heard of Terry Doyle: "Ten or fifteen years from now, hopefully my baseball career would be over,” he said, “and I’ll join the workforce. I always wanted to get into teaching. Hopefully, I can go help out some kids.” - Robert Baumann

3. Local game stories with Ortiz rehabbing: Four or five paragraphs about his heel/foot, a picture of Ortiz, a few quotes, and then at the tail end, maybe one sentence about the actual game and the pitching. SOME PEOPLE CARE ABOUT THE PAWSOX.

4. " Doyle allowed one run on two hits while walking one and striking out five over five innings of work on Saturday. His walk and his surrendered run both materialized in the first inning, but then the 27-year-old retired 13 of the 14 batters he faced in the subsequent four innings." - Plus more stuff on Doyle from PawSox Blog.

THIS AFTERNOON! Rubby De La Rosa v Adam Morgan. See you there!


4.16.13 Pawtucket Red Sox v Lehigh Valley IronPigs - Tommy Joseph's Passed Balls

IronPigs take another one, 8-6. Win goes to reliever Jake Diekman. Chris Hernandez had a tough start and gets the loss for Pawtucket.

Hernandez certainly labored through his five innings of work and has the 97 pitch count to show for it. He gave up seven runs on six hits, although only three were earned. Hernandez also gave up a couple of home runs.

Jonathan Pettibone got the start for Lehigh Valley. Pettibone, after a scoreless first, led the second off by hitting catcher Ryan Lavarnway with a pitch. Lavarnway became a non-factor when Bryce Brentz grounded into a force out, but then Pettibone allowed center fielder Mitch Maier to single. Pettibone then walked Drew Sutton to load the bases, then walked in a run with Justin Henry at-bat. 1-0. And then a sac fly from Jeremy Hazelbaker made it 2-0 Pawtucket.

The IronPigs pulled ahead in the third when right fielder Leandro Castro hit a three-run homer. Lehigh Valley struck again in the fourth inning, when catcher Tommy Joseph also hit a three-run homer off Hernandez. Aw, crap.

Drew Sutton and Jeremy Hazelbaker provided a pair of runs for the Red Sox in the bottom of the fourth, tightening the score a little to 6-4. An error by second baseman Brock Holt in the fifth allowed another run to score for Lehigh Valley. 7-4 IronPigs. In the fifth inning, Pawtucket scored another pair of runs off reliever Justin Friend, with RBI singles from Mitch Maier and Justin Henry. 7-6!

IronPigs first baseman Cody Overbeck hit a solo home run in the sixth off reliever Pedro Beato to make it 8-6. Relievers Diekman and Michael Stutes held the PawSox scoreless for the remainder of the game.

Pedro Beato and Ryan Rowland-Smith also appeared as relievers for Pawtucket. Rowland-Smith pitched two scoreless innings.

he doesn't know who jesus was or what praying is:
1. Mitch Maier went 3-3. This guy David Ortiz got no hits. Dude, we're trying to win some ballgames here. This is not a place to work out your personal shit.

2. Just kidding, I love David Ortiz. That's legit.

3. Headline: "Phillies Catching Prospect Tommy Joseph Cannot catch a Baseball." Location: aqui. (Philliedelphia)

4. As I'm sure you have heard, Steven Wright was supposed to start this game but was called up to Boston.

5. The Phillies have a slew of young pitching talent in the system that they are very excited about. Pettibone is one of the "Baby Aces" they're high on. He's just a baby! I mean, he's a big, strong, athletic kid... But I think he's barely 22. Phoul Ballz has an interview.

6. PawSox manager Gary DiSarcina talks about our new boyfriend: "He gets down in the count and is not afraid to hit with two strikes,” DiSarcina said of Maier. “We love having him here. He’s a baseball player and he throws up good at-bats every time he goes out there.” I love having him here, too! (Craig Forde)

7. "Can you return a redbox movie to any redbox? Does it have to be the same one you bought if from?" - He's just a baby!

TONIGHT! It's Terry Doyle. According to some dudes who sat behind me the other night, "That's Doyle's brother!" Opposing is... Cesar Jimenez?

Have a great night, everybody.


4.15.13 Pawtucket v Lehigh Valley - Carpenter

IronPigs win 8-3, thanks to Chris Carpenter's disastrous eighth inning. Baby, what happened?

Starting pitcher was male protagonist Allen Webster. Webster was good as gold, pitching five decent innings and giving up a home run to that punkass Josh Fields. Wait, wasn't Fields going to be on the PawSox? Okay, no, that was Josh Fields Who Is a Pitcher. Webster got seven strikeouts and looked really good overall.

Tyler Cloyd pitched for Lehigh Valley. Cloyd pitched six innings and Pawtucket nabbed him for three runs. And the score was 3-1 for a great deal of the game and Chris Carpenter had one job to do. But.

So Josh Fields homered in the second inning and you should have heard him talk about it after the game. Kind of not so smart, like Brittanya. The score was 1-0, but the bottom of the third inning proved to be a fruitful one for old Pawtucket. Third baseman Justin Henry led off with a single, then scooted over to second when beefy catcher Dan Butler hit a productive groundout. Cloyd's next opponent was second baseneck Brock Holt and yeehaw, Holt walked.

Cloyd induced a flyout from Jose Iglesias, but then he walked JC "Jose" Linares. Come on, Cloyd! Linares is good for a big fat whiff! But no, Linares walked and Cloyd had to face Mark Hamilton, who did nothing more than hit a three-run single that was aided by an error by Canadian centerfielder Tyson Gillies. And that was when I saw what this team is really like: ALIVE! With swag for days. And why not? They've been really successful so far. It's been a while since I've seen a team like this and I guess I forgot that the PawSox can be more than hangdog misery cases. I like it. For now. I'm looking at you, Hamil-Toe, strikeout king.

We need to talk about Chris Carpenter's inning. First batter he faced was Cody Asche, rhymes with trashy. Carpenter walked Asche, big whoop. But then my pal Darin Ruf doubled and Josh Fields' crazy eyebrows  doubled and two runs scored and when it pains, it roars. Overbeck smacked a hard line drive single to right. Carpenter walked Tyson Gillies. Did you notice that there aren't any outs yet? Carpenter struck out catcher Steven Lerud and the crowd went nuts. But then he gave up a two-run single to shortstop Michael Martinez. And popular kid Cesar Hernandez reached on an error that scored Gillies. D'oh! Somehow Carpenter hitched up his panties and got a couple of groundouts to end the inning, but game over, dude.

Can you handle a little more pain? Of course you can, because you're probably a cutter. Anthony Carter came out for the ninth inning and walked Ruf and then Josh Fields hit a home run. It's okay, it's Lehigh Valley, it's not like the Red Wings or Buffalo. I was gone at that point anyway. I had to pick up a pizza for a fat friend of mine.

two things:
1. I think the most important thing that I took away from this game was that Mitch Maier is mad cute. I can't believe it. There's almost never anyone good-looking on the PawSox but this season there's a little something for the ladies. You should really see his pants.

2. David Ortiz was in the original lineup and I even saw him come out like, seconds before game time and run a little in the outfield, but instead we got JC Linares, who Bob Socci called "Jose". Sorry, Tennessee.

3. Justin DeFratus and Joe Savery pitched the bottom half of the game for Lehigh Valley and did quite well. DeFratus got the win for the Pigs.

4. Oscar Villareal pitched a pair of scoreless innings for Pawtucket so he gets a golf clap.

5. "It appeared the PawSox would start fast in the bottom of the first when leadoff batter Brock Holt ripped a single and stole second. With Jose Iglesias in the box, however, home plate umpire Ben May called a third strike against him, and also proclaimed Holt out after he had stolen third. He did so citing batter’s interference." - Jon Baker, Woontucket.

THIS AFTERNOON. Steven Wright v Jonathan Pettibone. Hope it's a good one and I hope the sun shines in yo FACE!



4.14.13 Pawtucket Red Sox v Rochester Red Wings - Mitch is Haier

Pawtucket wins 5-2 in eleven innings, and now they are 9-1 and Rochester is 2-8. It's early.

Starting pitcher was Jeremy "Zito" Kehrt, who got a couple of outs in the fourth inning and called it a night. Kehrt gave up two runs on four hits, including a home run by Clete Thomas. Oh, Clete Thomas.

Starter for Lord Rochester was Andrew Albers. Albers did a great job, pitching five scoreless innings with five strikeouts and no walks. He left the game with his team up 2-0.

In the bottom of the seventh, Pawtucket tied the game when possible steroid user Drew Sutton hit a two-run single. And then the game was all tied up until the eleventh inning... GOD. I'm so STUPID!! Of course the game was tied until the eleventh, because the game was eleven innings long. SO OBVIOUS.

It was Anthony Slama again, reliving a Rhode Island Nightmare. He walked Iglesias and everything was dark and happening in slow-motion and he heard screams... Blood everywhere... Slama tried to stop everything but all he could do was keep pitching the ball and he could see what was coming but he was helpless to stop everything from derailing... And Slama got two outs and he thought he could see maybe a different outcome with Bryce Brentz approaching the plate and everything got really quiet and he could hear his heart beating in his ears and he tried to breathe in and out but Brentz was out of focus and Slama's circle of vision kept tightening and he thought he would wake up at any second... Every pitch came out wrong, no matter what he tried... He couldn't feel the ball right, it wasn't coming out right, his arms were awkward and he tried to relax and not overthink, not get too aware of his own body and its angles but next thing he knew Brentz was at first base because he'd walked him after only one swinging strike and Iglesias had stolen third and Mitch Maier was there, another batter, another summitless mountain he'd have to climb and more than anything Slama didn't want Herrmann running out to him, he wanted an ending, for better or for worse, but his first pitch to Maier was a ball and Slama felt the air temperature dropping, dropping and he felt like he was drowning in infield dirt and he did not surprise himself at all by throwing another ball to Maier and in a way this calmed him and the clouds cleared a little and he located the next pitch but Maier was on top of it and calm as anything, Maier swung hard right through it, clocked, line drive to right and over the fence.

Sorry, Rochester Red Wings. Kevin Slowey isn't walking through that door. Neither is Nick Blackburn.

her name is panik:
1. Win goes to Ryan Rowland-Smith, who pitched three no-hit innings. 27 pitches, it was awesome.

2. The game was only three hours and fifteen minutes long, which is breezy considering the extra couple of innings. Some of those regulation-length RailRiders games clocked in longer than that.

3. Knuckleballs, a blog, has an article entitled "The End of Anthony Slama". How prescient, Eric Pleiss!

4. Jon Baker, Pawtucket paper: "The bash came on southpaw Anthony Slama’s 2-0 fastball, with Jose Iglesias stationed at third (after a walk, Ryan Lavarnway’s groundout and a stolen bag) and Bryce Brentz at first.
“As soon as I hit it, I knew the outfielder wasn’t going to catch it,” Maier grinned long after his teammates mobbed him at the plate. “I thought if it stayed fair, it might be a double and we’d win the game. When I saw it go past the foul pole, I was amazed.
“This is awesome!” he added. “I thought I got hit in the leg by a water bucket, and once I got (inside the tunnel to the clubhouse), I got a pie in the face.”
When asked who the culprit had been, he laughed, “Mr. Lavarnway, but don’t worry. His time will come. After all, it’s a long season.”

Long quote, but it needed to be included.

5. Jay Miller! "[I]t was a new face, late to the party, who found his batting eye just in time Sunday afternoon. Veteran major league outfielder Mitch Maier, who'd been sidelined in spring training when he hurt his left wrist, ended yesterday's eleven-inning deadlock with a three-run walk-off home run, just inside the foul pole in right field, for a 5-2 PawSox victory." I wish I had Jay Miller's job. I never should have dropped out of college.

6. Cody Christie is a North Dakota Twins Fan: "The Twins refusal to give Slama a legitimate shot at the big league level is perplexing to say the least. He has shown the ability to have very good success at the minor league level and it seems that the natural progression would be to give him more of an extended look with the major league squad. Over the last two seasons, there have been plenty of questionable arms that were used out of the bullpen so it seems curious to not give Slama a chance. He isn't getting any younger and he is getting close to 30-years old so his chance at being a regular at the big league level might have already passed him by."

7. Look! I have a lot of material to link to because David Ortiz didn't play yesterday! Thanks, David! Take two days off, they're small.

TONIGHT. IronPigs! Oh my god, it's going to be absolutely freezing but I think I am going. I'm cold already. Allen Webster v Tyler Cloyd. Maybe I'll double up on iron pills?

Paz afuera!


4.13.13 Pawtucket Red Sox v Rochester Red Wings -This is the real party.

Pawtucket wins, 7-1. Win goes to Terry Doyle and Anthony Slama takes the loss. FREE ANTHONY SLAMA!!

Doyle pitched five innings and gave up one run on two hits. Doyle also struck out five and walked one batter.

Starting pitcher for Rochester was Shairon Martis, who you probably remember from other IL matchups. Martis pitched 3 2/3 innings and gave up one run on four htis. In fact, this game was tied at 1-1 until the sixth inning.

The Red Wings scored first when left fielder Chris Colabello hit an RBI single. Pawtucket responded with an RBI single of their own in the second inning, which tied the game up until the sixth inning.

Anthony Slama had entered the game in the fifth inning to get one out. Slama faced JC Linares in the top of the sixth and walked him. Left fielder Jeremy Hazelbaker and second baseman Brock Holt hit back-to-back singles to load the bases. For who? For Jose Iglesias, that's who! But Slama walked Iglesias, bringing Linares in and giving Pawtucket the 2-1 lead.

Enter lefty Caleb Thielbar, who says crap like, "RANDOLPH ROCKETS, AMIRITE MAW AND PAW?" Thielbar had to face David Ortiz and probably wasn't scared. But he should have been. Ortiz hit a two-run single. Catcher Ryan Lavarnway then hit a sac fly for the first out. And then Bryce Brentz K'd to make it two outs. But Thielbar hit Brandon Snyder with a pitch. And Drew Sutton hit a two-run double. Crazy inning.

Chris Carpenter's eyebrows came and closed the game out, not that it was a save situation.

worms to ex-girlfriends:
1. Just remember, team: The important thing today is that David Ortiz progresses and that his Achilles feels fine. Now go out there and pretend anyone cares about the rest of you!

THIS AFTERNOON. Rochester Red Wings again! Looks cold and cloudy but don't let that stop you.

4.13.13 Pawtucket v Rochester - Makeup

Pawtucket wins 7-1, just like the other game where they won 7-1.

Starting pitcher was Rubby De La Rosa... I think I covered this already. Graham Godfrey got the win, with 3 2/3 scoreless innings after De La Rosa. Godfrey allowed no hits and struck out five. Jeremy Hazelbaker, who batted ninth for some reason, hit a home run.

Okay, next.



Got my IronPigs tickets. Booked hotel. Can't wait. YEAH BASEBALL!!!

garden tool + bartender from the Simpsons + writing instrument + R


PawSox win home opener, 5-4. Totally forgot David Ortiz was going to be there. But there he was, wearing that gray pullover thing he always wears. Also I thought that Ortiz may have played for the Red Wings because of all the time he spent in the Twins org. But today I discovered that their Triple-A team at the time was the Salt Lake Buzz of the PCL. I have never heard of this team before or could have featured its existence. My mind is blown. Can anyone prove this was an actual team that played competitively? I have never seen one piece of memorabilia or a picture or heard it mention in, oh I don't know, the innumerable amount of baseball games I have listened to or watched on television or attended or read about? I'm sorry, are you now going to tell me about a team called the Taunton Fire Jets that were the Double-A affiliate of the Astros?

And I never could have guessed that Jose Iglesias would be the first Red Sox player to hit a home run at McCoy this season. His eight-year-old twins must be so proud of their father!

Chris Hernandez started for Pawtucket, gave up two runs during his 4 2/3 inning start. Hernandez wasn't exactly blasting rockets, but I feel like he's progressing. His last start, Hernandez threw 81 pitches, 40 for strikes with 4 BB's and 3 K's. This go-round, he threw 84 pitches, 51 for strikes, with 2 BB's and 5 K's. Baby steps!

Starting pitcher for the Red Wings was the rather leggy Kyle Gibson. Gibson cruised through the first couple of innings, but then Iggy homered and the whole world went topsey-turvey. Or lambsy-divey. Artsy-fartsy? Anyway, he got the loss.

Gibson's undoing came in the fifth inning, with a bunch of hits and a couple of runs. Reliever Caleb Thielbar gave up an RBI single to Drew Sutton, which was charged to Gibson.

Jose De La Torre got the win. Scoreless relief was provided by Graham Godfrey and Anthony Carter. Do you really care about the stuff in the middle?

cual e' tu vaina?
1. Drew Sutton is like jacked. Was he always that big? I've never seen him naked but it must be impressive. And Dan Butler is enormous. Also, Cookie lost a ton of weight and looks sexy and terrific.

2. I did like the Hernandez/Brandon Boggs at-bat in the third where Boggs saw a lot of pitches but Hernandez was able to strike him out.

Tonight's game was canceled due to sandstorms.


4.10.13 Pawtucket @ Lehigh Valley - On Account of Rain

The teams played two innings and then the rain was too much.

Allen Webster gave up three hits.

Bryce Brentz got a hit. Lehigh Valley starter Jonathan Pettibone hit Brandon Snyder with a pitch. He had it coming!

See you tonight, I guess.


4.9.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Lehigh Valley IronPigs - They think he's nothing special. I don't agree, I think he's wonderful.

5-1 Pawtucket. Steven Wright gets the win and Lehigh Valley righty Tyler Cloyd smarts from the loss. Cloyd only had one loss in 26 minor league starts last year, but is kicking off the 2013 season 0-2.

Wright pitched six innings and gave up one run on six hits. He struck out six and walked three. Relievers Pedro Beato and Anthony Carter went on to pitch scoreless relief for the PawSox, allowing only two hits between them.

IronPigs starter Tyler Cloyd gave up all five Pawtucket runs during his five inning appearance, including a two-run homer off the bat of first baseman Brandon Snyder in the second inning. Snyder had a productive game and went on to hit an RBI double in the fourth.

Left fielder Bryce Brentz continued his hot streak, hitting a line drive single to left in the fifth inning that scored two runs. All of Pawtucket's production came from the bottom half of the lineup, with zero hits and zero RBI coming from the first four batters, including leadoff man Jeremy Hazelbaker.

1. IronPigs manager Dave Brundage had a bad feeling about his team facing a knuckleballer: "We probably won't score any runs tonight and have a whole different lineup tomorrow."

2.  Basic stuff on Brandon Snyder: Drafted first round by the Orioles in 2005, lived in that organization until Jan 2012, when he was traded to Texas for cash considerations. The Rangers released him during spring training and Boston snapped him up. Snyder's played on the Tides before, so you've probably seen him at McCoy Stadium. Or in Norfolk, if you happened to road trip down there.

TONIGHT. Allen Webster versus righty Jonathan Pettibone and his effective changeup. And then tomorrow's the Pawtucket home opener, oh my god, are you ready? Do you want to talk about it?

Hope my game recap was dry enough for you. It's long been my dream to be a generic corporate conformist sportswriter.



4.8.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Lehigh Valley IronPigs - Pete and Re-Pete

IronPigs win, 14-5. Loss goes to reliever Graham Godfrey. That's a big win, but holy crap the Charlotte Knights beat the Norfolk Tides 21-4 yesterday. Maybe I should be writing about them!

Pawtucket's starter was righty Rubby De La Rosa, who everyone is very excited about but his start was not as good as Allen Webster's. De La Rosa pitched 2 1/3 innings and let's just say his ERA is now 19.29. Two home runs were involved. Who knows what happened? All I know is that there are so many new people on the IronPigs! Except Pete Orr. Pete Orr will never die.

BJ Rosenberg started for Lehigh Valley. Rosenberg also had a bad start! He pitched three innings and gave up five runs on six hits, including a couple of home runs. So Pawtucket was up 5-2 by the second inning, but scored no further runs last night. Good relief work from Michael Stutes and Justin Friend and Jake Diekman.

The PawSox led the first inning off with a bang, getting a solo home run from leadoff batter Jeremy Hazelbaker. Drew Sutton singled himself on base and then was knocked in by the mighty Bryce Brentz, who hit his first HR of the season. 3-0!

IronPigs third baseman Cody Asche responded with a solo home run in the bottom of the second, making it 3-1. The top of the second was filled with junk like passed balls and walks and stolen bases and wild pitches, garnering Pawtucket another pair of runs. That's when their luck/talent ran out.

After scoring a second run in the second inning, Lehigh Valley exploded like a shaken soda pop in the third. Center fielder Tyson Gillies, the only 'Pig who went hitless last night, walked with one out. Second baseman Cesar Hernandez followed with single, and then Cody Asche hit a line drive double to right that Brentz couldn't get a handle on. That's because Bryce Brentz is all bat, no glove. Two runs score and De La Rosa is replaced by Graham Godfrey. Godfrey allowed another pair of runs, but finally got Leandro Castro to ground out and end the mayhem. 6-5 IronPigs.

A double, a couple of singles, and a failed pickoff attempt in the fourth inning bumped the run total up to nine for LV. And they just kept on rolling while Pawtucket gnashed their teeth and rent their garments. Chris Carpenter was scored on, Alex Wilson got a couple of outs to end the seventh, but kicked off the eighth by giving up a three-run homer before getting anyone out. Oscar Villareal was the only pitcher who made sense in this crazy, messed-up world and pitched a scoreless inning.

Maybe pitch better next time, Pawtucket?

your only options are salad and french fries:
1. Michael LoRe has more on the bullpen's superlative work: "We needed to pick Rosie up a little bit,” Friend said. “He struggled but battled and as a bullpen we needed to get in there and eat some innings. Obviously, offensively we swung the bats well so it made it easier to attack guys.” Rosie? OH MY GOD YOU GUYS THE IRONPIGS HAVE A ROBOT MAID!!!

2. Noise Nation has everything you ever need to know about the IronPigs, including some great pictures from last night's game. I love this blog!

3. I am not going to link to this, but the ballpark in Allentown has some kind of gaming thing in the urinals that you piss on. Or something. Evidently this is very exciting.

4. Jeff Schuler, who could also set the building on fire, provides a handy roster breakdown.

5. Outfielder Leandro Castro made a great defensive play in the third on a hit by Jonathan Diaz: "But running at a full gallop from his position in right field, Leandro Castro ran the ball down just in front of the warning track for the inning's second out, and a Rosenberg strikeout got his team back in the dugout."

6.  Are you kidding me with this shit? "Cauton Flag out for De La Rosa..." reads the headline. Right there. Keep it classy, Woon/Paw paper.

7. The IronPigs now have more uniform flexibility: "Assistant minor league director Steve Noworyta said the minor league department under the direction of Joe Jordan felt it was time for give the players the option of wearing their uniforms in the same fashion as most of their major league counterparts. 'But they need to wear it properly,' Noworyta said, adding that the pants must have a 'snug fit'." HAAAAAAAAAA.

TONIGHT! Steven Wright and Tyler Cloyd at sevenish. You should go! I heard David Ortiz might be around tonight or tomorrow or Thursday night in Pawtucket. Good luck.


4.7.13 Pawtucket @ Scranton - 18507

Pawtucket wins again 6-2 and they want everyone to know they're looking for a good time. They gave you their heart and they tried to make you happy... And you gave them nothing in return. Win goes to Terry Doyle and Brett Marshall takes the loss. Marshall then cut it up and distributed it amongst the poor.

Doyle was the Pawtucket starter and he pitched six and a third scoreless innings. Scranton wasn't hitting much yesterday and they only managed a single off Doyle. He struck out five of those guys, though. Walks? Also five, but who's counting?

Brett Marshall strutted out to the mound for the RailRiders, probably wearing one of those cheesy FDNY caps. Marshall pitched his little heart out but sputtered in the middle of the fourth inning and had to be replaced by Sam "The Law" Demel.

So let's relive Marshall's agony! After a scoreless and probably zippy first inning, the PawSox got the first run of the game by way of a Mark Hamilton ground rule double that scored Ryan Lavarnway. Alright, Ha - I mean, alright, Mark!

Later, in the third inning, shortstop Jonathan Diaz led off with a ground ball single to third, which Marshall deflected when he maybe should have STAYED OUT OF IT! Marshall, possibly having a significant emotional reaction, walked the next two batters to load the bases. Drew Sutton approached the plate and I can't tell you how thrilled I am that Sutton's returned to Pawtucket. I have so many fond memories of the time Sutton fielded that one ball... Or all the times Sutton had an adequate plate appearance. And I can't help but smile when I picture Sutton in the dugout... With pants and a cap... He was just a kid!

So third baseman Drew Sutton hit a sac fly to left. Things became incrementally more interesting after that, because Ryan Lavarnway hit a two-run single. And then Bryce Brentz, hottest guy on the Pawtuckets, hit a double that scored nobody but still counted for something.

(Just so we're clear, I mean that Brentz is hot with a bat. Not in the face. I mean, I'm sure he's reasonably attractive but it's not like I going to start a separate blog with lots of pictures of his pants and his mouth and his arms and then talk about what a whore his girlfriend is and how he could do much better. Bryce Brentz is hot with a bat, but not in the pants, is what I'm saying here.)

Had enough of Brett Marshall? He's not finished yet. Marsh (he said I could call him that) started the fourth by walking center fielder JC Linares. He struck out Diaz, but gave up a single to Jeremy Hazelbaker and a double to Justin Henry. Marshall's last order of business was to get Sutton out, which he did! Demel maintained a poker face as he ran out of the bullpen and got Lavarnway out to end the inning, but another run for the Red Sox made the score 5-0.

There was a great deal of simmer-down in the next couple of innings again, but the merciless serpent that is Pawtucket struck again in the seventh inning. New Scranton pitcher, Josh Spence.Spence got the first couple of outs, but then Brandon Snyder doubled and Mark Hamilton drove him in. Looks like Hamilton kicked 100 percent of the Yankees' ass! 6-0.

The RailRiders scored a run apiece off relievers Ryan Rowland-Smith and Nick Carter... Excuse me, Jimmy Carter. But whatevs, no chance, and Melky Mesa made the last out and that's what he gets for beating up on the PawSox last summah. 6-2 and the Yankees' heads on pikes. Nice work in Moosic, PA.

it's okay to be a ghost. it has its pleasures.
1. I'm sure JC Linares is a decent center fielder, but he doesn't seem to have the build for it. He's like an upside-down bowling pin. Don't you want someone lean and lithe out there? Remember Jonathan Van Every? It's gazelles like him you want chasing balls down, not an inverted Christmas tree.

2. At least Brett Marshall is in touch with his feminine side: "Received an awesome valentines day gift box full of chocolate and a new coach wallet from my awesome girlfriend! Love you" Haverford much?

3. "A fireworks show at PNC Field led to a brush fire behind the stadium after Saturday night’s Scranton/Wilkes-Barre game." - I told you that park was cursed!!

4. Donnie Collins, one of my sportswriting heroes, gets on top of Brett Marshall: "On paper, Marshall is a smallish right-hander whose fastball sits at 91-92 mph, who relies on command and getting groundballs, who has a fine change-up and who is still working on his slider. That makes him like a lot of guys in the minors. What separates Marshall, though, is his knowledge of hitters, his knack for pitching."

5. More Donnie Collins: "In the series, the RailRiders were outscored, 30-12, by the defending Governors' Cup champions. Even though the season is just four days old, the RailRiders say they can't dismiss as a product of a small sample size what has become simply a bad start.
"There's really no other way to look at it," third baseman David Adams said. "Is it frustrating? Absolutely, it's frustrating. What makes this game fun is winning and producing. And right now, we're doing neither."

6.  "The RailRiders managed only four hits all day, none for extra bases. Mesa, Almonte, Neal and Maruszak each picked up one hit. They were 2-8 with runners in scoring position. Mesa, Johnson, Romine and Neal each struck out twice. Brett Marshall had a rough day. He lasted just 3.2 innings, giving up five runs on six hits, four walks and four Ks. Preston Claibrne pitched a perfect ninth inning, picking up one K." - Tamar Chalker

7. Matt Ferenchick has good things to say about the remodeled ballpark! "And now without the upper deck, it just feels more like a baseball stadium. The old stadium never used to have seats behind the outfield wall. While there are still no seats there, they plan on opening it up for lawn seats later in the season, which should further improve the atmosphere. Old PNC Field used to just be a pile of seats with baseball played in the middle. Now it feels like a baseball stadium."

There's almost no local coverage of this sweep, which is so fucking stupid I can't bear it. I did see Ludwig Von Schwechheimer and Mike Tamburro on TV yesterday afternoon on some local business program, so that was fun.

By the way, I listened to quite a bit of these games on the radio to get a feel for the new guys. I think I prefer Bob Socci, since he's a little more laid back. He's from the Vin Scully school, I feel. Jeff Levering knows his stuff, but he can't help himself from ejaculating about baseball minutiae. Also he's got a somewhat outdated slickster announcer voice. But we'll see. I think overall I like both guys but right now I feel like I'm driving down the Atlantic seaboard and listening to whatever game I happen to receive on the radio.

TONIGHT. Pawtucket's in Allentown to face the IronPigs! This should be fun. Rubby De La Rosa starts for Pawtucket, BJ Rosenberg for Lehigh Valley.

Paz afuera!

4.6.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Scranton Wilkes-Barre RailRiders - The Pennsylvania Twist

Pawtucket wins 7-2, and shares the best record in the IL with Buffalo, Louisville, and Gwinnett. The Red Sox gave no quarter to the RailRiders, who might have probably kind of wanted to win at least one game at their home opener series. Now all anyone will remember is how bad the traffic was. That ballpark is cursed!

Your capable starting pitcher was Chris Hernandez and his rare, beautiful left arm. Hernandez evidently struggled with command/location, throwing 81 pitches through four innings and walking all the fat kids on the RailRiders. Hernandez gave up two runs on four hits, but only one run was earned. That's because Jonathan Hee made two errors. Some people compliment Hee's fielding, but I am not like all the other girls. I compliment his diction and erudition.

Starter for Wilkes-Barre was Graham Chappell Stoneburner, who has a name like that because he is from Virginia and descended from plantation owners and v. old money and Founding Fathers. Like Cla Meredith! Stoneburner, who has probably never gotten high in his life, pitched four innings. Pawtucket must have liked him alright, they scored three runs off him.

SWB scored first, in the bottom of the second, when shortstop Gil Velazquez hit an RBI single. The Red Sox responded with authoritah in the third inning, though, when center fielder JC Linares led off with a single to center. Linares, an unlikely center fielder if I ever saw one, advanced to second base on a wild pitch. Dan Butler, prototypical beefcake catcher and wearer of underpants, hit a line drive double to right like a good, strong boy.

Stoneburner struck out Hee, but walked Hazelbaker and gave up a single to Henry. Drew Sutton was faced with a bases loaded sitch, but instead reached on an attempted force that scored Butler and Hazelbaker. 3-0 Pawtucket!

A third inning RBI single by third baseman Addison Matuszak made it 3-2 for several innings. Red Sox relievers Pedro Beato and Jose De La Torre provided scoreless goodness throughout. Like some kid named Derwin.

Ninth inning, Jim Miller pitching for the Scrankees. Miller got Bryce Brentz out, which is no mean feat considering what a killer series Brentz has had. But Miller walked the next three batters so Jonathan Hee could hit a grand slam.

Come on. Hee? Grand slam? It was really Hazelbaker, who blasted one over the fence in left center. I thought fences were supposed to be horse high, pig tight, and bull strong. Isn't that what they say on the farm, J-Bakes?

(12 hours later)

two things:
1. This game came in just under three hours!


Also I helped make ice coffee cupcakes and even though a lot of people prefer cookies I have to say these were celestial.

Have fun and I will see you tomorrow.


4.5.13 Pawtucket @ Scranton Wilkes-Barre - alone with my friends

Pawtucket SMASH! Game two's another win, 9-4. I'm cringing for the RailRiders, who probably wanted to come out of the gate winning.

Starter for Pawtucket was Allen Webster, who pitched five scoreless innings. It was perfect, he hit the 85 pitch mark and then dropped the mike. The win went to reliever Oscar Villareal, though, who also blew the save. One of those triple-A things.

Dellin Betances pitched for SWB, four innings and two runs. Both runs came in the first inning, when Brad Snyder hit a two-run single. The Red Sox scored a third run in the fifth inning off reliever Ryan Pope. Outfielder Jeremy Hazelbaker led off with a triple and was then summarily swatted in by a sac fly by Justin Henry.

But the RailRiders scored a trio of runs in the seventh off Villareal to tie the game. And for a moment, they were so happy. That is, until the top of the eighth with reliever Josh Romanski giving up five runs to Pawtucket. Designated hitter Mark Hamilton hit a three-run homer. Other things happened, but they obviously make less of an impression.

Scranton collected another run in the bottom of the eighth with Chris Carpenter on the mound, and Pawtucket responded with yet another run in the top of the ninth. Bryce Brentz hit like his third double, and there may have been another run but Ryan Lavarnway was thrown out at home. Because he can't run too good? Not necessarily. This game was over three hours long and again, probably coldish and I'm sure no one wanted to prolong things.

Carpenter wrapped the whole thing up with a scoreless ninth.

two things:
1. The first six batters in the lineup got two hits each. Jonathan Diaz got zero hits and struck out four times. Both Hamilton and Snyder logged three RBI.

2. "More positives for the 25-year-old Betances is that when the PawSox loaded the bases in the first inning, he minimized the damage instead of letting it snowball, something that happened regularly last year. And two of the three hits he gave up in the first weren't hit hard and one that was hard was a shot to the mound that ricocheted off Betances' glove." - Dave Rosengrant, here.

3. More stuff about traffic and parking issues at the ballpark in Moosic. "Team officials said their advice to fans is to leave early, expect delays and try to be patient." At least they're kind of admitting there's a problem.

4. "How come every two word name these days has to be scrunched together into one word with a capital letter in the middle?" - Chris Wise from Watching Durham Bulls Baseball feels my pain!

5. McGair writes about Allen Webster, could be in Pennsylvania: "Webster attacked the RailRiders with mainly fastballs and sliders with a few changeups sprinkled in. Though throwing curveballs is part of his repertoire, Webster said he felt comfortable enough to shelve the pitch for at least one evening.
'The slider was working and we stuck with it,' said Webster."

Tonight! Phil Hughes was supposed to pitch, but he went to New York. Probably to see The Nance. So TBA on the RailRiders and Chris Hernandez for Pawtucket. Please leave early, because I heard traffic is a real bitch.


4.4.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Scranton Wilkes-Barre RailRiders - Dr. Cheeks

Pawtucket takes the first matchup of the series, winning 8-4 in ten innings in a long, cold ballgame. The W goes to Alex Wilson. And hey, look! Gil Velazquez!

Starting pitcher for the Red Sox was Steven Wright, the guy from last year who is known for two things, and I'm not talking about tits or testicles. Wright pitched four innings and gave up two runs on four hits. He walked four, struck out five, threw a wild pitch, and 46 of his 82 pitches were strikes.

Starter for the RailRiders, who are the Yankees and who also have a compound word team name with a cap in the middle (Like the IronPigs!), was Vidal Nuno. Nuno went a little deeper than Wright, pitching four innings and then getting a couple of outs in the fifth before ceding to beloved reliever Sam Demel. Nuno gave up two runs on three hits, including a two-run homer in the fifth by first baseman Brandon Snyder, who says crap like "What a better way to spend Easter then to drive across gods beautiful country!!!".

Scranton drew first blood last night, scoring a pair of runs in the bottom of the first thanks to Wright issuing a brace of walks and a donation of hits. Wild. But Wright settled down and kept the RailRiders scoreless through the rest of his outing.

Pawtucket tied the game up in the fifth when Bryce Brentz doubled right before Snyder's home run. After the pitching change, second baseman Jonathan Diaz drew a walk and stole second. Shortstop Brock Holt hit an RBI single and Pawtucket had the lead. It would have been more exciting if it weren't 38 degrees at that point.

SWB knotted things up in the seventh, with reliever Jose De La Torre walking a couple of dudes and setting up a sac fly situation. Good stuff, Thomas Neal. The game stayed tied through a few more innings and a slew of relievers I don't care about. Top of the tenth, Jim Miller pitching. Miller got the first out, but then outfield corn stalk Jeremy Hazelbaker hit a home run. Drew Sutton then walked and stole second, which proved to be mega-alluring to Ryan Lavarnway's big bad bat. POW! Double to right! And Sutton runs home.

Bryce Brentz! Brentz followed Lavarnway's double with one of his own, which is no surprise because when you're at a restaurant with Bryce he's always like, "That sounds good! I'll have the same except no onions!" Lavarnway scores, and it's 6-3 Red Sox. Cool, right? Not cool enough, according to Justin Henry, who went ahead and hit a home run with Brentz at second. Sorry, at third due to an error by Zoilo Almonte. 8-3 Pawtucket.

Anthony Carter came in to lock it up in the tenth, but he wound up walking everybody and allowed the Yankees to score a fourth run. But then Carter struck out the big guys in order: Dan Johnson, Melky Mesa, and Cody Johnson. I hope it hurt like hell.

two things:
1. Bryce Brentz went 3-5 with two doubles. Ryan Lavarnway doubled and struck out four times. He also netted two passed balls.

2. PawSox killer Melky Mesa struck out five times. Gladdened.

3. New! Renovated! Ballpark! Come early, or you'll have to park a half mile away: "My advice would be to get here early, because it's a hot ticket this year," Mr. Ruby said. "Parking is no different than years past, though." Whatever you say, Mr. Ruby. Also, noted asshole Reggie Jackson was there.

4. Corban Joseph is so smart: "“I don’t necessarily think we lost steam (after the first inning) I think the pitcher just figured out what he was doing wrong. The whole team just went in there trying to put quality at-bats together and we just didn’t get as many quality at-bats back-to-back I think.”

5. "If Nuno was on a pitch count I have to imagine they’re saving him for something, right? He was pitching a lot in the spring already, so it shouldn’t have been necessary." - commenter Jason Cohen on Pinstriped Bible

6. Is it too late for a SWB team preview from Tamar Chalker? NEVER!

7. READ THIS: Donnie Collins talks to players about their feelings for the renovated ballpark.

8. Yes, it's true: Dan Johnson and Cody Johnson are married!

9. And Donnie Collins again with a killer game summary. Donnie Collins kicks ass. Why does he have to kind of work for the Yankees?

10. Bricks.

Time's up already? Zounds! That's what I get for slacking and not even really knowing half of these PawSox guys. So embarrassing. Anyway, tonight it's Allen Webster and Dellin Betances. See you tomorrow!