4.15.13 Pawtucket v Lehigh Valley - Carpenter

IronPigs win 8-3, thanks to Chris Carpenter's disastrous eighth inning. Baby, what happened?

Starting pitcher was male protagonist Allen Webster. Webster was good as gold, pitching five decent innings and giving up a home run to that punkass Josh Fields. Wait, wasn't Fields going to be on the PawSox? Okay, no, that was Josh Fields Who Is a Pitcher. Webster got seven strikeouts and looked really good overall.

Tyler Cloyd pitched for Lehigh Valley. Cloyd pitched six innings and Pawtucket nabbed him for three runs. And the score was 3-1 for a great deal of the game and Chris Carpenter had one job to do. But.

So Josh Fields homered in the second inning and you should have heard him talk about it after the game. Kind of not so smart, like Brittanya. The score was 1-0, but the bottom of the third inning proved to be a fruitful one for old Pawtucket. Third baseman Justin Henry led off with a single, then scooted over to second when beefy catcher Dan Butler hit a productive groundout. Cloyd's next opponent was second baseneck Brock Holt and yeehaw, Holt walked.

Cloyd induced a flyout from Jose Iglesias, but then he walked JC "Jose" Linares. Come on, Cloyd! Linares is good for a big fat whiff! But no, Linares walked and Cloyd had to face Mark Hamilton, who did nothing more than hit a three-run single that was aided by an error by Canadian centerfielder Tyson Gillies. And that was when I saw what this team is really like: ALIVE! With swag for days. And why not? They've been really successful so far. It's been a while since I've seen a team like this and I guess I forgot that the PawSox can be more than hangdog misery cases. I like it. For now. I'm looking at you, Hamil-Toe, strikeout king.

We need to talk about Chris Carpenter's inning. First batter he faced was Cody Asche, rhymes with trashy. Carpenter walked Asche, big whoop. But then my pal Darin Ruf doubled and Josh Fields' crazy eyebrows  doubled and two runs scored and when it pains, it roars. Overbeck smacked a hard line drive single to right. Carpenter walked Tyson Gillies. Did you notice that there aren't any outs yet? Carpenter struck out catcher Steven Lerud and the crowd went nuts. But then he gave up a two-run single to shortstop Michael Martinez. And popular kid Cesar Hernandez reached on an error that scored Gillies. D'oh! Somehow Carpenter hitched up his panties and got a couple of groundouts to end the inning, but game over, dude.

Can you handle a little more pain? Of course you can, because you're probably a cutter. Anthony Carter came out for the ninth inning and walked Ruf and then Josh Fields hit a home run. It's okay, it's Lehigh Valley, it's not like the Red Wings or Buffalo. I was gone at that point anyway. I had to pick up a pizza for a fat friend of mine.

two things:
1. I think the most important thing that I took away from this game was that Mitch Maier is mad cute. I can't believe it. There's almost never anyone good-looking on the PawSox but this season there's a little something for the ladies. You should really see his pants.

2. David Ortiz was in the original lineup and I even saw him come out like, seconds before game time and run a little in the outfield, but instead we got JC Linares, who Bob Socci called "Jose". Sorry, Tennessee.

3. Justin DeFratus and Joe Savery pitched the bottom half of the game for Lehigh Valley and did quite well. DeFratus got the win for the Pigs.

4. Oscar Villareal pitched a pair of scoreless innings for Pawtucket so he gets a golf clap.

5. "It appeared the PawSox would start fast in the bottom of the first when leadoff batter Brock Holt ripped a single and stole second. With Jose Iglesias in the box, however, home plate umpire Ben May called a third strike against him, and also proclaimed Holt out after he had stolen third. He did so citing batter’s interference." - Jon Baker, Woontucket.

THIS AFTERNOON. Steven Wright v Jonathan Pettibone. Hope it's a good one and I hope the sun shines in yo FACE!


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