I own what might well be the world's ugliest vase. For reals. Not only is it ugly, but it's all grimy and misshapen. I think someone made it. I bought it at a thrift store here in CF for, say, a dollar.
The thing about the vase is, for a long time, I didn't understand it. It had all these weird symbols potteried onto it: a palm tree, a footprint, some red and blue squares, a pale blue rectangle with the letters "DR" cut out of it.
Then, one day, it hit me. Red and blue squares... the arrangement suggested a flag. DR. Dominican Republic. Palm tree! Some green commas that might be plantains! Yes! YES!
It is clear to me now what I need to do. I need a Dominican appraisal. Tonight, I bring the vase to Enrique Wilson. He will tell me all its secrets and possibly autograph it for me. Then I will photograph it in all its majesty and post it on the internet.
Hee-Seop Choi is gone. I heard some rumors that he was milking his injury and being sort of a pain in the ass. K, die!
And one of the funniest things I read was the Keith Foulke in Pawtucket report. He threw a couple of pitches, went up to RJ and said (essentially) "Ron, sorry, but I can't do it." He then said to the media as he climbed into his "black luxury vehicle"... "I really don't want to talk about it."
Keith Foulke is such a total bitch, and I love him for it. He's just such a blatant redneck asshole. I think it's great. I would love to ask him for an autograph just to hear him say, "Fuck off."
See you later!
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