i swear i'll burn this whole city down

Jimmy Serrano. Ah, good ol' JS. Everytime I walked up the swirly, twirly ramp and past the Paws Pavilion over to the posted lineups at McCoy, there you were... dry-markered in. The night's starting pitcher. How uninteresting you were! How I longed for Abe Alvarez or Papelbon or Lester! Or maybe even Zink! But there you were, doggedly doing a decent job, hanging in, biding your time.
I took you for granted, Jimmy. I gave mounds of credit to Marc Deschenes for doing essentially the same thing you did. Was it because he was ruggedly handsome and you were just... rugged? Were your weasel-like features that off-putting? Did you have an overly graphics-heavy MySpace page?
Well, Serrano, I think you've been replaced. Meet RHP Adam Bernero. He's a righty, like you were. Originally signed by the Tigers. Been up and down and around. Pitched in FOUR major league (Kansas City and Philly) games in '06. Has a dazzling .591 career ERA. And, oh yes, I think he'll be moving into your old locker in Pawtucket.

In "Well, What Do I Know, I'm Not A Professional" news, the Red Sox have allegedly resigned Lenny Dinardo. I also cannot find any proof of this, which makes me wonder if it's just a weird dream I had. Hmm... that would explain a lot. Especially the snake wearing the vest.

Barry Zito, SF Giants, 7 years. Later, Beez. Remember that time you won the Cy Young? And Pedro was all bitter? And then everything went downhill for you after that? Remember that?

That was awesome.

2002 Barry Zito is Dinardo's baseball wet dream.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Re: Lenny DiNardwuar. I remember an article from last month about how he was pitching for our Arizona Fall League team, the Wild Pigs or whatever. So, he's like, ours in some way.