Pawtucket Red Sox v. Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs of the Future - Oh. Hi.

Okay, okay! Don't push us when we're HOT! (8-2 PSox)

Nicaraguan man of marvel Devern Hansack went 7+ innings and gave up 2 runs while striking out six Lynxmen. He threw 102 pitches and walked no one. Just when I was babbling about the Pawtucket starters not getting stretched out! Well, it is obviously because he is being showcased. What, trade Hansack? YES. Manny Delcarmen pitched the rest of the game and that is when I realized that Delcarmen has been missing for a while. Was he injured? Was I just not paying attention? The pitch speed indicator sign was not working, but MDC must have been mid-90's, judging by the resounding catcher-mitt thwack. SNAP. SNAP. SNAP. Strike three! Three Ks in 1 2/3 innings for Delcarmen. Everyone was so happy.

Zack Segovia was 1-7 before the game started and now he is 1-8. The Lynx have replaced Pawtucket in the IL cellar and are none too thrilled about it. There were relievers involved in the Ottawa pitching tonight. Just so you know.

Jeff Bailey was an offensive juggernaut tonight! Not juggernaut, that word is so overused. Jeff Bailey was a runaway Conestoga wagon tonight! When he came up to the plate in his second at-bat, I had that funny stomach feeling and sure enough, he cranked one out. Three hits and four RBI in all for JB, who also doubled. He was a triple shy, which is like being a Yahtzee shy.

Joe McEwing got on base a couple of times. He is a total pain in the ass on first, I might add, as he feints and bluffs and skitters around. They were trying to pull off a hit-and-run with Murphy at bat and it worked out pretty well.

Ottawa's offensive star was catcher Jason Jaramillo, who had three hits and knocked in a run.

It's nice to see Pawtucket getting their shit together a little bit. I hope it lasts a while.

Sorry, Lester, we were only kidding!
1. Joe McEwing is my favorite. He just looks so fucking happy to be playing baseball and that in turn makes me happy to watch. I love him like Bob loves David Ortiz.
2. They were giving out "junk balls", which are like souped-up Wiffle balls. Jeff Bailey and Brandon Moss got hold of one and I watched them toss it to each other... that ball is CRAZY!
3. Yes, I put chopped onions on my french fries.
4. David Pauley is a hardcore dugout rat. You know how Tim Wakefield is always present in the dugout, just sitting and leaning with his hands in his pockets? Pauley is like that, except animated to the point of near-nuisance.
5. Lester seems to be in good spirits in spite of the giant Red Sox cocktease. He's shed his Hardship Goatee which makes his melon look less huge. He is pitching on Friday so we'll see how it goes.
6. The outfield has been getting shuffled around lately. Tonight B. Moss played left and did a pretty good job. Ellsbury was back in center. Trade talks heat up. Who stays? Who goes?
7. I would rather sit near the kids' birthday party section at McCoy than near high school youths in Old Navy flip-flops and Hollister hoodies. They are so, so ugly at that age and yet they find themselves to be so entertaining. I really, really hope I wasn't as stupid and mallratty at that age.
8. Alex Prieto playing short? What's next, a talking banana?
9. Runelvys Hernandez is now a Yankee... a Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Yankee, that is!
10. I may be paranoid, but I swear there is at least one PawSox player that is onto me. Like he knows about my blog and the unflattering things I say. I think I've seen him looking at me with the narrowed eyes of annoyance. Am I being paranoid? I'm being paranoid.

good night.

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